Update / No Videos This Week

Sorry everyone, I won't be able to upload any videos this week.  I usually have videos pre-recorded a few weeks in advance in case of things like this but this time around I've been sick for at least the last three weeks (fun... 😐)

It sucks cause I was trying to keep to a schedule but as I have several chronic illnesses, sometimes I don't get a choice in what I'm able to do.

I'm not sure if I've gone into any detail about my numerous health issues on my channel (mostly because I want to keep things positive and not sound like I'm having a moan, haha), but here's the run down if you're interested:

About 6 years ago, I got really sick and ended up in the respiratory ICU with pneumonia... after that my health hasn't been the same.  At first I had pleurisy in my left lung as a result of the pneumonia (this is basically a wearing away of the lining of your lung... which is extremely painful.  It flares up occasionally still from time to time, but is fairly under control at the moment *knock wood* (I need to find a forest and do some serious knocking haha - don't want to get that back like it was again).

Over the past 3 years I've been seeing doctor after doctor trying to figure out why I'd been increasingly tired and experiencing different pains and getting sick so frequently with flus.  I was diagnosed with CFS (chronic fatigue syndrome) about 2 (?) years ago and I'm still seeing specialists about symptom management and trying to figure out whether I have fibromyalgia or polymyalgia due to the pain symptoms I have in my hands, arms and back.


My doctor described CFS pretty well, in that she said CFS can occur after a major health problem (ie the pneumonia I had), basically it's your brain getting stuck in the time of that illness so it will constantly tell you you're still sick (and make you feel sick) when you may look, sound (although I do lose my voice quite a bit), and your blood tests come back relatively fine. So of course there's the whole "invisible" illness that is hard to explain to a lot of people and no matter how awful you feel there'll always be that "wonderful human" being that thinks you're full of shit...

The fatigue often worsens with activity and doesn't improve with rest - or caffeine (which trust me, I try).  At first it was just physical activity, exercise or long days at work that seemed hard to recover from and I'd get sick with flu symptoms and lose my voice almost constantly.  Now, it feels like just leaving the house for more than 2 hours or "over doing" it can be just playing a video game or anything that involves mental concentration.

I went out to go to my regular doctor appointment several weeks ago and also my dog had a vet appointment around the same time, so I'm thinking maybe that's what brought on this three weeks of sickness and needing "recovery" time.  It's so frustrating when you just want to DO things and get things done - and of course, when I'm having a "good day" or feel ok for a few hours I tend to "over do" things cause I feel like I have the energy and I'm not feeling like crap and can do things...


So basic run down of CFS symptoms, in case you were wondering:

People may experience:
Pain in the joints or muscles
Whole body fatigue, inability to exercise, or malaise (which is basically getting sick/needing a fair amount of recovery time after doing... well basically anything at this point for me.
Cognitive: confusion, forgetfulness, or lack of concentration (or brain fog)
Sleep: excess sleepiness or sleep disturbances
Mood: anxiety or apprehension
Also common: depression, headache, nausea, stomach problems, muscle weakness, sensitivity to pain, or sore throat

The "brain fog" I've sort of learned to laugh at or joke about later... though it's sort of scary as I wonder how it's actually effecting my brain.  I'm not *that* old yet, but I worry sometimes it's having some permanent effect.  Not being able to follow a conversation on a bad day or just constantly forgetting short term memory things.


And throw ptsd, depression and anxiety in the mix and my life is basically about managing symptoms of everything, doctors appointments (I can't tell you how sick I am of doctors appointments haha) and doing what I can when  I can.


That's why I started making videos again.  Even though I have to pace myself, it's something I feel like I can still do, provides an escape/distraction.


Anyways, I'm very sorry about the lack of videos this week.  Hopefully I'll be back on top of things next week and things will be back to 'normal' or some approximation of it (haha).

Please be kind to yourselves and each other ;)